It Begins, Part One

Our story begins on a Thursday night. My wife and I were sitting on our new couches, one of the many pieces of new furniture acquired after the “Great Bedbug Disaster of 2011,” contemplating the current state of television. “Do we have anything recorded?” she asked.

“No,” I responded, conveniently ignoring the backlog of Boardwalk Empire episodes sitting at the bottom of the screen. While it is indeed a fine program, I simply was not in the mood for Scorcese’s potent mix of bootleggers, corrupt politicians and incestuous psychopaths named Jimmy. “Did we finish The Big Bang Theory?”

“Yeah… last week…” She muttered before trailing off. I knew what she was going to say next. It’s the same question she always asked in these types of situations. I closed my eyes, mentally preparing myself for what was to come. “Why don’t we try Doctor Who?” I did not respond. Deep down, I hoped that my silence said it all. Unfortunately for me, it did not say anything. She continued: “We don’t have to start at the very beginning; just with the new guy. Unless you can think of something better…”

And there it was. My out. All I had to do was name an alternative, and I was home free. In past versions of this conversation, I responded to this “not quite a question” with a laundry list of cult television shows. It was this answer that brought the fourth wall insanity of It’s Garry Shandling’s Show, the sublime geekiness The IT Crowd and the outright strangeness of American Dad into our bug-filled, slumlord controlled domicile. All I had to do was say a show. That’s it. Just one show in order to stave off the looming specter of The Doctor for another few months. There was just problem: I couldn’t think of anything. My mind was blank. I needed to say something. I needed to buy myself time.

“Hon… we’ve been over this. No Doctor Who. It’s too long, too complex and large portions of it are missing. And besides, I know you. You claim that you’re going to start with the new series, but you won’t. In three months, I’m going to come home to you reading the transcripts of a lost episode while knitting yourself a Tom Baker scarf. No.”

“But… But…” She said, flashing me the “sad look.” I hate the sad look. Still, I was holding my ground. Then she did something completely unexpected: she stopped talking. She was playing hardball. After a few minutes of this, I relented… or so she thought.

“Fine… We’ll watch Doctor Who… but only if we start from the beginning.”

“The beginning? You mean the reboot, right?”

“No,” I said, smiling slightly. “I’m talking about the very beginning . First doctor.”

“Um… hon? No one starts Doctor Who from the beginning. In fact, most fans say that starting from the beginning is one of the worst things you can do.” I had her. There was no way out of this one. Sure, we didn’t have anything new to watch, but at least we didn’t have to watch Doctor Who.

“Those are my terms: Who from the beginning, or no Who at all.” I smiled from ear to ear, as something magical just transpired: I won. That does not happen often. It was at that moment she said the unthinkable.

“Yeah… let’s do it. Who from the beginning.”

…And there you have it. They say that all journeys begin with a single step. Mine began because of a comeback that backfired.